I used the word "supposed" a few times. Some parents have found a lovely gem of a tool to use over and over again. Other parents have thrown up their hands and said "nothing motivates my child!" In the documentary, Freakonomics, the reward system is disproved as a valid method for motivating *most* children. In the documentary, they explain the results of a study put out by a university, in which low performing students in a high school are offered a large sum of money to boost their grades. The study results were disappointing: far less students made the effort to study then expected. The money was nice, but it wasn't enough to make a change in many students' behaviors.
One of the authors of Freakonomics describes his experience with potty training his daughter with M & Ms as the reward system. His results were very much the same that I experienced: a child able to manipulate the system for M & Ms, but not actually willing to become potty trained.
I've given the reward system a bad rap over the years, and did not believe it to be a good option for my own children, until recently. I think I've hit upon the secret of using the reward system successfully. First, I'll share a story:
Over a year ago, I realized the need to teach my children their multiplication facts. I had had a baby and was incredibly busy changing diapers, doing laundry, and catching up on sleep with cat naps. This did not make a good homeschool teacher. I recognized this need and hoped to encourage some independence in my children. Afterall, the facts had to be memorized, one way or another. I offered a reward, with the hopes that they would take a month, learn their facts, and happily take what I offered. At first, my oldest (then age 9) was motivated and began studying her facts. She memorized 2s, and a little bit of her 3s before giving up. When I asked her about it, she blamed me: I wasn't providing the activities she needed to learn them. I explained that this was her job: if she really wanted to learn them, she would devote the time and effort to studying them. She shrugged mysteriously, and that was that.
One year later, I decided that if I waited for her to become motivated, she would never learn her facts. I set up timed drill and enforced practice every single day. In less than 2 months, she had 0-5s memorized. She earned the first half of her reward: lunch at a fast food restaurant. The second reward will be given once she can complete 0-9s. Through this story, I learned that the reward system CAN be used successfully, but not in the way you might think...
Set up very clear expectations.
"Learn your multiplication facts" is not a clear enough goal. If your child can come up with the answer to 9x9, but makes 2 erroneous guesses first, or it takes 30 seconds to figure out the answer, is it truely mastered? I researched typical expectations for the task and maturity level and came upon this goal: Math facts are mastered when each fact can be answered in 3 seconds. If my daughter can complete a 100 problem worksheet in 5 minutes, with 0 incorrect, she has the facts truely mastered.
Don't expect it to motivate or change behavior
Unfortunately, if you want it to happen, you're the one that needs to move heaven and earth to make sure that it does. Enforce the learning, making certain that progress is being made. The reward itself is not enough to motivate most students. You provide the structure and ensure that your student is working toward the goal. If left to be done independently, don't be surprised if your student lacks motivation. Once you've seen the goal met, don't forget to reward yourself, too! (Afterall, teaching is hard work).
If I'm doing so much work, what is the purpose of a reward, then?
Even though you're overseeing the work and making sure that it gets done, there are definite benefits to using a reward to encourage your student.
- It provides more than just "because I said so". It offers another reason to meet the goal.
- Finally meeting the real goal gives your student a sense of success and accomplishment.
- The reward offers a tangible way to see that the goal was accomplished and is a way to celebrate.
- You're training your child to learn how to set goals, work toward goals, and set rewards for themselves when they are older.
The reward system can offer real benefits to your child; however, do not expect that to be enough. Your child may not show the independence and work ethic that you are hoping to see. If the task is valuable enough to you, you'll need to see it through to make sure that your child does it. Set realistic and clear expectations so that both you and your child can measure their progress and know when a goal has been met. You will need to enforce the task and make sure that it is being worked on regularly. Give the reward once the task has been completed. This can give your child a real sense of accomplishment, is a way to celebrate the goal in a fun way, and can teach your child how to set their own goals and rewards in the future.
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